Meeting Persephone

Now that Mini-Me's room is all but done, I'm going to take a moment to enumerate some similarities I've been pondering the past couple of days.

Palin = Cheney lite with slightly larger breasts. How did I come to this conclusion? Well I doubt you're even wondering that - clever folk that you are, I'm sure you've thought of it yourselves, but I'm going to blog about it.

First of all - if McCain is McSame meaning the same as Bush (or Bush the sequel) then looking at the similarities between Palin and Cheney is only a natural progression. I'll even do this one "ladies first" style...

1. Palin loves guns and hunts moose and other game. Cheney loves hunting and shoots purchased fowl and friends of the GOP. Advantage - Cheney (though Cheney did NOT field dress his friend and Palin can field dress a moose).

2. Palin loves earmarks(until caught with her hand in the cookie jar at which point she denies ever having supported them at all). Cheney loves earmarks and doesn't even have the decency to bother denying his manipulation of tax payer dollars for the benefit of his friends in high places (he being his own BFF) via no-bid government contracts. Advantage - Cheney (just because he's not completely weak about who he is).

3. Palin loves the whole idea of drilling for oil and hates nature (ask the moose). Cheney loves owning oil companies and profitting off of the destruction of nature. Advantage - Cheney (just for the sheer numbers and dollars he's made off of it).

4. Palin insists that creationism should be taught alongside evolution in school and denies equal rights to homosexuals based on her beliefs but will not pass a law denying homosexual government workers equal benefits because that would be "unconstitutional". Cheney belongs to a party that the majority of which will not support his own daughter being in a long lasting, committed relationship with a partner of the same sex. Advantage - Cheney (thanks, daddy).

5. Palin has abused her power by hiring and firing whoever she wants and stabbing anyone in the back to get what she wants and is under investigation for it in her state. Cheney shoots his friends and gets them to apologize for it which makes his enemies not dare to cross him. Advantage - Cheney (you da man - seriously - you da man).

6. Palin's 17 year old daughter is 5 months pregnant out of wedlock despite her mother's immaculate (pun intended) reputation as a "family values" advocate. Cheney's daughter gave birth out of wedlock because her own father belongs to a party that will not permit her to marry the woman she loves. Advantage - Cheney (way to go, Grandpa!).

7. Palin claims to be a "fiscal conservative" and, while mayor, gave her town a $23 million deficit. Cheney and Bush also ran on the "fiscal conservative" stance and have landed us with $9,668,194,123,052.30 of debt. Advantage - Cheney (because he's been a part of $37,000 more debt per capita but Palin seems to be well on her way to being a real "fiscal conservative" if just given the resources!).

8. Palin denies human involvement in global warming - apparently towing the "our God gave us the earth" line (though, if memory serves, it says "the MEEK SHALL inherit the earth" not "screw this shit up - it's all your'n"). Cheney acknowledges global warming but, like Palin, doubts it's caused by human beings and likes to pass the buck to other countries who also don't contribute to global warming because they're human beings which justifies not signing Kyoto..... ok, that's where I get fuzzy. Advantage - Cheney (because now I'm confused and can't make sense of the logic of this mumbling live-chicken-head-biting idiot and don't know what else to say).

I've declared Cheney the victor in being most repugnantly Republican though I also have to make allowances for Palin's youth and lack of resources being up there in Alaska this entire time. She's just not had the opportunities that Cheney has had to truly corrupt - absolutely! Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. She may not be as bad as Cheney - yet - but she's hardly had absolute power. I anticipate that she could give him a run for his money (all of it) if given the opportunities he's had.

I'm sure there are more, but I've only had so much time between painting and making casseroles for school functions.